新西兰代写 那些搞笑的0分留学文书
很多家庭优越的中国学生,在写留学文书时,简直如同是在说相声一样的搞笑,一方面想要通过文书来改变老外对于我们中国留学生“不学无术的阔少爷”的固有的刻板印象,另一方面还要以此树立出新的形象,然而他们自己万万没有想到,出国还没有开始就已经结束了,what?我尼玛呕心沥血写出来的“著作”竟然没通过?招生员居然看了几秒就扔了?新西兰代写小编来给大家分享一些搞笑的0分留学文书.
1. 啰嗦,没有重点,冗长
原文:
My mother is a neurologist, who was too busy to take care of me at home, my father is buzy (busy) too. So I spent most of my childhood in a small room next to her office……(此处省略N个自然段) My life continued like this until I was ten.
译:我的母亲是个脑神经学家,他没有时间在家照顾我,通常直接给我钱,还有我老爸也非常的忙,所以我在我妈的办公室度过上下五千年,啊,我完美的人生,一直如此,直到9岁那年认识它
凌乱的招生官:what the hell?你究竟在说什么?你想要表达什么?你要申请学术性研究生了,你9岁之前的事,不用这么介绍吧?又不是写伟人传记。
2. 自恋型
原文:
I‘m a fantastic boy, who has learned finance for over four years. To be honest, I always think I’m a miracle in this field……Reading Wall StreetJournal every morning enables me to have a really awesome business sense. Most importantly, my overall GPA is 3.6.
译:我是一个吊炸天且谜一样的男孩,学习金融已经四年了,不是我吹大牛B,我总觉的冥冥中有一个声音在告诉我,我就这个整个金融业的未来!而且每天早晨起来,我都会读金融相关的报纸,因为这样,能够让我的金融嗅觉达到极致
招生官:小伙子,从你的文章中我感觉到了迷茫,你似乎意不在申请我们的学校,而是要收购我们的学校,你似乎产生了某些“老子是巴菲特的幻觉”,结果你跟我说GPA3.6?
3. 名人名言型
原文:
There is an old saying goes like this, “Failure is the mother of success.” I agree. Though I was not a straight A student, I always remember Socrates said, “The unexamined life is not worth living.”So, I keep fighting and never giving up. Every time I tired, I will think about Einstein, who taught us “Try not to become a man of success but rather try to become a man of value.”…..
译:古语有言:失败是成功的妈妈,emmm,我很同意这个观点,虽然我没有拿到A那么流弊,但苏格拉底的话让我彻夜难忘:没有检验的人生,是因为还不够浪,所以每当我在孤单中伫立我也感觉我很坚强,就算每一次受到打击我也不会留下委屈的泪水,爱因斯坦曾经说过:不求成功,但求飞翔。
招生官:小伙子,我觉得你跟他们这么熟,引用了他们很多的话,你还是通过个人关系让他们帮你来写文书吧。
4. 中介型
原文:
Last but not the least, I was the president of Student Union. I led a team of 50 students to organize an English contest in our school and it was really success. Besides, I want to work for charity after I graduate from the U.S.
译:老子是个学生会主席,老子组织的50人英语竞赛天下无敌。
招生官:小伙子,你是老夫今日所见到的第107个有着王者梦想的主席,此时此刻他们应当在回梁山的飞机上,为了能让名著完整,小伙子你就做那第108个吧。
5. 广告型
原文:
I love your university very much. I believe it’s the best university in the world. Your school trained a lot of celebrities. What’s more, New York Times and Washington Post all speak very highly of this school. Needless to say, your school is in the Top 30 list of U.S News…
译:hey yo come on,我非常非常爱我的学校,她是我的梦中女神,它培养了很多名人,纽约时报都夸我学校很神,排名三十也有我们。
招生官:hey bro,get out。
讲道理小编看到这里已经笑得前仰后合了,不知道各位看官如何?如果你有论文写作上的困难,请移步至澳洲论文代写网。